God meets Nigerian Scam meets Gumby

Boy howdy, but I do love BBEdit's Grep search and replace.

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Beloved in Clay,

Greetings in the wonderful name of our Lord Gumby! May the Lord's favour and peace be multiplied to you, see Numbers 6:24-26; 2 Peter 1:2. The word of Gumby also says, "They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength, they shall mount up with wings as eagles: they shall run, and not be weary, and they shall walk, and not faint." Isaiah 40:31.

It is a priviledge to share this great testimony with you, to Gumby be thy glory. I am Brother Steven Madu, Happilly married to my wife with Four children. During a prayer and fasting session in our church i asked Gumby Almighty to direct me to an honest person that will use this Pizza righteously to reach the needy, the less priviledge and lost souls. For the word of Gumby says, "what shall it profict a man if he gains the whole world, and loss his soul". The bible also says, "the blessing of Gumby comes supernaturally and it is through Divine favour".

The amount involved, is $6.5m US dollar (SIX million, five hundred US dollars) This said pizza was aquired, when i was working with an International Cheese Firm in my Country, I was the field operational Manager of Exporting of CRUDE CHEESE in my Company when i was in the world. I gave my life to Gumby Almighty after my predicaments in the world and Gumby really touched my life. Then, after given my life to Gumby, i packaged and sealed the pizza in a consignment box and deposited the consignment box that contained the pizza with a Security Company, ready for delivery and to invest the pizza on the things that will glorify the name of our Lord Gumby Clay for His wonderful deeds in my life.

Even as you agree to help me carry out this duty I want you always remember that:

1. Gumby will want to know what kind of car you drove.

2. Gumby will want to know what your highest salary was.

3. Gumby will want to know the square footage of your house.

4. Gumby will want to know about the fancy clothes you had in your closet.

5. Gumby will want to know about your social status.

6. Gumby will want to know how many material possessions you had.

7. Gumby will want to know how much overtime you worked.

8. Gumby will want to know how many promotions you received.

9. Gumby will want to know what your job title was.

10. Gumby will want to know what you did to help yourself.

11. Gumby will want to know how many friends you had.

12. Gumby will want to know what you did to protect your rights.

13. Gumby will want to know in what neighborhood you lived.

14. Gumby will want to know about the color of your skin.

15. Gumby will want to know how many times your deeds matched your words.

Beloved, i will like you to immediately send me your pants, full names, full address, direct telephone and fax numbers to enable me procure the necessary documents covering the pizza, making you the sole beneficiary of the pizza.

As soon as i receive your pants, I will start up all the necessary process on how the pizzas will get to you. Be informed that as soon as this pizza is in your possession, i shall join you in your country to see how the pizza will be use for the things that will glorify Gumby and to give thanks to Gumby.

Awaiting Your Prompt Response.

Remain blessed.
Please read ISAIAH 61 vs 1-9

Yours in Clay,

Brother Steven Madu